So the iPad was announced last week. I, like most tech geeks, have been waiting for this announcement, wondering what Apple had up it's sleeve. Just about everyone knew it was a tablet computer, but everyone expected Apple to reinvent the wheel here.
Well I can say that from what I've seen, they fail. Miserably.
Where do I fucking start? How about the fact that this:

looks a HELL of a lot like THIS:

Yeah. That's right. It's a giant fucking iPod Touch. It doesn't run OSX, but a bigger version of the iphone OS.
Okay, so maybe that's not too much of a problem. Except that:
1)
There's no multitasking. Perhaps this is something that Apple will allow in the future. I imagine that you'll be able to listen to music while you run other programs, but that's about it. Okay, so that's not TOO bad. You can get away with it on the ipod/iphone.
2)
No Keyboard. You instead have a virtual keyboard like on the iphone/ipod touch. Okay, this is a major one for me. With my ipod, I use my thumbs for typing in landscape and my finger for typing in portrait. It works pretty well. Now how the hell am I expected to type on this thing? Lay it flat on a surface and use it like a regular keyboard? Stand it vertical and use it like I do my ipod? What the hell? Oh, but thank GOD that Apple is willing to sell me a keyboard/dock for only $70. Thank YOU Apple.
3)
No USB. Um. What? No USB ports at ALL? What is this? 1994?
4)
No Flash. Y'know Apple....you MIGHT have wanted to settle things with Adobe before you release something like this. Sure I can surf the internet on this thing, but how valuable is that when half of it is crippled?
The pricing starts at 499 for a 16GB model. That's not too bad really, as most people were expecting it to be just under $1000. However that's for wifi only. Adding 3G costs 130 dollars more. I was initially pretty harsh about this, but I've since calmed down slightly about it. Wifi should be good for most people.
Oh, and have I mentioned that this thing is marketed as between a netbook and a laptop. Okay, not this is where it starts to get stupid. I can buy a netbook that does a shitload more than this for a lot less. For $570 (I'm adding a keyboard, since I doubt many will get one without it) I can get a full LAPTOP that blows this thing out of the water!
The main strength of this device though is that it looks to be a good e-reader. And that's what this thing really is. A glorified e-reader with some extras thrown in. And there are better readers out there.
It's ironic that most of my friends thought I would be excited about this product and were surprised that I shot it down in a blaze of mediocrity. Apple was being extremely lazy here in my opinion. If they came out with a functional tablet that ran OSX, then maybe I wouldn't be so harsh. However, this is just a blown up ipod touch! Now, I'm not an apple hater. I recently bought an ipod touch a few weeks ago, and I've owned an iBook in the past. I know Apple is capable of some sweet computers. However, this shit is just crazy. Steve Jobs unveiled this crippled device and then proceeded to act like he did us a huge favor by saying that it was much better than a netbook.
Steve? Apparently you and I have differentiating opinions on what constitutes as "better". Because if I had a choice whether to spend nearly 600 on this thing or a netbook/laptop, I would choose a laptop in a damn hurry. Even if I wasn't computer literate, I'd pick something functional over something that looks pretty.
Tags: apple, crippled device, fail, ipad, ipod
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